The right way you can have a healthy fight with your partner to save your relationship

Conflicts are a part of a relationship and they are even considered to be healthy for a long-term relationship. When you make the big decision of spending your life with a particular person, you also choose a particular set of unresolvable problems. And that's normal. But what isn't normal is to not fight the right way and make these unresolvable problems a reason to distance yourself from your partner, which eventually ends the relationship. When it comes to resolving arguments to save your relationship, communication is the key. Put yourself in your partner's shoes, listen to what they say and choose words of empathy to let your partner know that you understand their perspective. Apart from this, there are a few more things you need to keep in mind to fight better with your partner to save your relationship.

01/ Use the right choice of words

How you start a conversation in an argument will influence how it ends. Harsh words will lead to more arguments and soft words will resolve issues between the two. Take responsibility as it takes both the people to make the relationship stronger. Complain without blaming the other person and focus on the positive need of having an argument. Start your sentences with "I" instead of "You" as the former sentences are less critical and won't make your partner as defensive as the latter statements. 

Don't judge your partner for what they did or said and instead be polite and use words like "Please" and appreciate your partner for understanding and listening to you when it is needed. Lastly, don't let things build up. If you do, it will only escalate in your mind until one day you blow up.

02/ Soothe each other and yourself too

Conflict discussions can very much lead to flooding of emotions or feeling overwhelmed, which makes the repair attempts impossible to hear. If you both feel flooded, take 20-30 minutes to yourself and focus on the positives of your relationship. You are of course forcing yourself to relax, but it will make a big deal to resolve conflicts. When you start to feel flooded, ask questions to each other on how to soothe each other down.

03/ Negotiate and compromise

This is the only way to solve relationship problems whether you like it or not. You eventually end up compromising for each other to fight for your relationship. It's all about negotiating and finding ways to accommodate each other. It is impossible to compromise unless you accept that your partner has flaws. Cherish your partner and be grateful for what you have.

04/ Address emotional damages

Arguments can leave emotional wounds sometimes even when you both resolve the issues. And this is normal but requires talking. It's about how you were fighting and how what you were fighting about that matter. Addressing your emotional damages to each other is called mastering the general problem-solving skills. Telling each other what injured you emotionally about a certain argument will make your partner to be softer with you around a similar kind of argument the next time.

from LifeStyle